I feel like it’s been a million years since I wrote anything on Birdie Bookworm, but it’s only been 4 months. It was the longest four months of my life, I swear. I feel like so much was off kilter in my world, and I didn’t have space for anything else. Not even books. Since November I read exactly two and a half. I finished the Truly Devious trilogy, and loved it. I also read Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits by David Wong. It was unlike anything I’d ever read before, and I think I needed that.
None of the books will get reviewed, sadly.
So, if you’re curious, ask about them in the comments.
Here’s what’s been happening with Birdie over the last four months…
In October I signed up for Noom. The months leading up to October I was starting to really face how much I really didn’t like myself. I’ll rephrase. I think I’m a pretty fantastic person. It wasn’t about who I am in my heart and in my head. It was about how I felt when I looked at myself. It wasn’t even my size, really. It was more about how I looked sickly. I decided it was time to take care of myself, and I dove into it.
I’m just shy of a 45lb weight loss. Yay me!
I’m no longer using Noom, though it was really wonderful at teaching you how to change your relationship with food and health. Now I’m addicted to my fitbit, while still following the lessons Noom taught me. I feel good again, for the first time in years. I feel confident. If I had took pictures of myself before, I could post a before and after. I didn’t. Pictures = the devil.
I was promoted. Super great news, I know. I’m proud of myself. On the other hand, it is a lot of extra work. You accept a promotion, you get a lot more responsibility. Responsibility means pressure. I have a LOT of pressure on me already.
I’ve become my Grandmother’s power of attorney, and it has meant I’ve become her main contact for everything. I love my grandma so much. I’m not resentful, but sometimes it’s hard. The family is at odds, for good reason. However, someone needs to be the go between, and so that’s me. There have been a few tearful nights, and suddenly I miss my grandfather so much. He was my rock, and I feel like he always made everything better.
And, on top of all that, Baby Chick has had some emotional trauma that was really alarming. Being a parent to a teenager right now is terrifying. I’ve watched her change over the last year, isolated and lonely. Therapy has become a staple in our household. It was scary for us, and a lot on top of everything else. It took a toll.
Something had to give, and it meant there was no space in my brain for anything extra. I needed to figure out how to organize it all before I could figure out where extra curricular’s could fit.
Let’s call the last four months a very necessary mind cleanse. The world talks abut mindfulness, but I really needed some mindlessness.
That’s where I’ve been. I’ve been mindless.
This feels good. Writing, I mean. I’ve always liked getting words out on the screen. Even if nobody’s listening, I love writing it down and sharing it into the void. I hope this means I’m coming out the other side, because it has sucked. It felt like nothing was really for me. Reading and writing, they’re my passion and for a bit there I lost them.
Especially, because – Do you know what I missed?!
There is a new Kate Daniels book!!! I went years without missing a new release, and somehow I didn’t even know this was a thing, let alone that it had already been released! I feel such shame. Like I have to give up the mantle of “Bookworm”.
So, I have it, but I haven’t started it yet. I read Soubound book 6, and it was excellent! I do plan to review it, tomorrow. I’ll write it tomorrow, and post it soon.
Upon completion I also realized there’s another PsyCop book! Another favorite author with a new release I didn’t know about.
Luckily all these unexpected releases gave me back the urge to read, and while I’m still careful about what I choose, Urban Fantasy seems just about perfect.
I’m hopeful I’ll be around a bit more frequently.