I know I’ve said this in posts past, but I’m finding it so hard to read emotional books. I keep buying them, I keep starting them, but I continue to quit over and over. It’s been a real struggle for me. Any non-reader may say I’m being dramatic, but I think you guys will all understand. I feel like something inside me has been broken. I have always loved to read contemporary YA stories with a focus on our current social issues, and I’m so behind the times because I can’t bring myself to finish them. The moment the story turns dark I find them impossible to complete.
Am I hiding from the struggle?
When I try to talk my anxiety down, I ask myself the two questions I’d ask anyone else:
First, what is the rush? If you’re not feeling it, they’ll always be there later.
Well, that is true, but the problem is I feel left behind. Contemporary YA reads mean a lot to me, and I’m missing all the dialogue. I still haven’t read The Hate U Give, and the movie is already out. I’m missing the conversation, and that kills me. By the time I read them, everyone else will be talked out.
Second, I’d ask them if maybe they could be okay without those books in their life.
I’m NOT okay with it! I can’t stand how I keep starting these amazing books, and a third of the way into them I put them back down again. There’s so much I want to say, but I don’t feel right reviewing a book I haven’t completed. So, I end saying nothing.
It isn’t okay. It’s awful. I need to fix it!
I’m not one of those readers who looks down on any genre. I love YA. I love Comedy. And I’m a HUGE fan of romance novels. In fact, I’m finding that the only books I finish lately are fluffy and lighthearted. These I can tread insatiably. I’m even finding myself leaning more toward the old style romance’s too, with the half naked historical dude on the cover, with a buxom blonde posed seductively on his lap. I haven’t read bodice ripping historical romance in years!
Is this what having a hard year causes?
Does you lose all substance?
If so, how in the world do I get it back?!
I’m currently stuck in this loop with The Wicker King. I’m loving it… but I know it’s about to get sadder and I’m really struggling with picking it back up to read! I’m going to try my hardest to push through it. Maybe that’s the secret? Maybe I just need to tackle my mental block with blunt force. Plow through it. If I can, then maybe I can go back and try Sadie again. And After the Fall! All these brilliant books with something to say. That’s what I want. I want to read light and fun, and I want to read dark and intense.
Has anyone ever experienced this before?
Seriously, I can’t be the only one!